Sunday was a very hard day. From the moment I awoke, I knew it would be so. My backache of a couple of days had bloomed to fruition. Not the usual lumbar issue but thoracic. So my breath would catch and I found myself grunting… a lot.
I have a very specific schedule in the morning, take the thyroid pill, wait a half hour, take the stomach pill with coffee and about an hour later have breakfast and this all happens before 0730. Simple, huh? Na uh. When I’m in significant pain, I don’t want to move. Moving means enduring more pain. So there I am, still sitting on the couch with no breakfast at 10am. I tell David that if he will make the bacon (he considers himself a professional bacon chef) I’ll make eggs. We do, we eat and I take my meds and just as I’m about to finish my bacon those tears well up and start squirting out of my eyes.
Overwhelmed with pain, but more than that… I have a Peggy Lee moment. I’ve had a lot of Peggy Lee moments, the longest was 2 months – January and February. “Really? Is this all there is? Is this the rest of my life?” Sometimes it’s hard to see past what’s happening right now and I was there. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life this way. What do I do? First, I remember the Peanut comic-
I send into the cosmic consciousness – “please give me a new perspective.” Then I do the superman stance-
Seriously, I do. The/my answers are in Innerspace, on my vision board, in a friend, in blogging, in all the things I do to push through this successfully, every time!
“In 2005, the National Science Foundation published an article regarding research about human thoughts per day. The average person has about 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those, 80% are negative and 95% are exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before and about 80% are negative.” ~from The Miracle Zone
What???! It’s true, look it up.
I have my moments, and when I do I go with it… but I try to keep it short (whoa, that’s a conscious decision), and I try to do things that will bring positivity into my life, help me see the light at the end of the tunnel. I read my vision board and say aloud all of the affirmations, I grow flowers and plants, I have little mantras I say to myself, I make my Facebook page full of living things-flowers, animals, birds… I make it pretty and light. It’s a very conscious choice. I slow down, try to make mundane daily tasks Zen/meditation moments. I Feng Shui’d my house, I make my living space pretty!
Just before Christmas last year I was in another bad space, I did a 30-day Law of Attraction blackout with social media, news, as much as I could with my phone. I can’t tell you how great this was to unplug! I flipped my dining/living room. Got out the paint and added a dash of whimsy… why? That’s me. It makes me happy. It also changed the dynamic of the house and steps to living room and kitchen. I’m going to cover this in another blog in the future. The point is when you have fairly advanced arthritis, and you’re getting older, you have to look at doing things that make life easier on your body and joints.
I cannot express enough how important positively feeding your brain is. You see it everywhere, and it’s true! It works! Pay attention to what’s happening in your mind, is your thinking negative? Quick! Stop! Switch to kittens!
Most of all, I knew the back pain was going to pass. Maybe that meant I needed to cry at the doctor, change something, or see it for what it might be… just a hiccup along the way. I’m thinking that’s what happened here because I’m already feeling better. Hiccups happen all the time, cause havoc and they are just… gone! One of the upsides is, they leave us with good self-care reminders.